To the men that are from mars...

Here is a little definition of something we know you've heard before but probably don't quite understand. Let me expound on this. When a girl doesn't feel good and you keep pestering her to tell you what it is and she says it's nothing I'll be fine, but you insist and she finally says "It's cramps ok?" and you do the whole "oh gotchya, so when do the pain meds kick in?" And you find that we're annoyed by this or don't want to do a whole lot of things but curl up in a ball with a hot pad and drugs that will hopefully knock us out. . . it's because we're in pure misery. I know what you men are thinking, "seriously? Suck it up, we do things all the time when we're in pain. Be a man."

The next time you want to say that to a "menstruating monster" here is a little list of what we mean by "cramps"

Our Lower back is aching and sore and does not in any way feel comfortable sitting up for long periods of time. So a long car ride to see a movie... Not your best idea. Try a new one.

We may or may not have a headache this is 50/50. But chances are we do, and turning up the radio or talking really loud isn't going to make us happier. This is why we may seem a bit ornery, it's also because our hormone level is pretty high and you're probably going to bug the crap out of us anyway. Sorry, you might not be able to win on this one with your funny jokes, or witty comebacks. Just play it nice.

Also, we may be bloated, (note the sweat pants) and we just want some comfort food. so if we decide to order a shake and a burger at the drive in instead of our normal salad or grilled chicken wrap with no mayo, don't ask "I thought you were trying to lose weight, don't you want the salad?" You say this, and you're just asking for tears and sobs and us possibly throwing all the food you just ordered out the window of the car... This one will not end well.

Another symptom we will be experiencing is fatigue. Now this one paired up with the actual cramp (which it does more than not) is rather one of the worst symptoms. By fatigue we don't mean we're tired, or not up for anything. This kind of fatigue is something that you're whole body experiences. Right down to our finger tips. It feels like the aching pain in our gut is sucking the life out of our very limbs. Like our whole body is putting energy into making the cramp hurt like heck. It's an effort to make the sharp pain in our stomach AND an effort to resist it or tolerate it. And we feel this way for two to three whole days and nights. It's non-stop. So if we say we just want to lie down and cuddle, or not even see you at all, don't take it personal. We're doing you a favor really.

So don't tell us to suck it up and be a man just cuz we have a tummy ache. A lot of the time we do suck it up just to be with you (if we're that into you) and go out and pretend like we're having a good time, even though we're miserable. And you may not even know it.

Hug the next girl you see. Because she's a freaking champion.